Tableside Talks: Bonnie Nag of Toro
Next up on Tableside Talks is Bonnie Nag, the dynamic force behind Boston mainstay Toro.
Bonnie's journey in hospitality began as a passion discovered while working through school. Little did she know it would become her calling. Her impressive career has seen her contribute to some of Boston's most beloved spots, including the former Tremont 647 and Sister Sorel, where Andy Husbands gave Bonnie her first opportunity to lead. Bonnie then moved into leadership at Island Creek Oyster Bar before joining the team Trina's Starlite Lounge and has spent the last several years leading the front of house team Toro.
Like so many others, Bonnie started as a server and earned her way into management through hard work and dedication. She's faced challenges head-on, emerging as a stronger leader for her team with each hurdle overcome.
When not crafting unforgettable dining experiences, you'll find Bonnie enjoying life's simple pleasures - beach days with her dog, good food, and the occasional night out.
Welcome in, Bonnie!
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
Deirdre Auld (Tableside): Bonnie, what was the most impactful piece of advice you received about leadership?
Bonnie Nag: I think it was really to make sure that you're always taking care of your team and your staff. They're your family and they're the people that are there for you the most. And they're gonna work really hard for you if you make sure that you're taking care of them.
Deirdre: In times of crisis or uncertainty, what do you do to maintain high morale with your team?
Bonnie: As managers we're humans, we're people. We have reactions and feelings and emotions. But I think the key is to be yourself, try to stay as calm as possible and deal with it. If you always do what you think is right, if you follow your heart, and you’re calm and centered in yourself, that feeling will move through the staff on its own. Then it’s easier to deal with what's in front of you rather than if you come from a place of an emotional state, then it becomes really difficult. Everybody else picks up on that, and then that's where all the stress starts coming.
Breathing definitely is so important, especially when you start to feel those feelings rise up. I think it's very important to just take a moment, breathe, and then really think about what you're saying and how you're acting. It's definitely something you have to work on and it takes practice, honestly. Not every time is perfect, but just trying to keep that consistency as much as possible is definitely the key.
Deirdre: What I heard from you, too, in that first answer was around the idea of authenticity, being yourself. Would you mind sharing a little bit more about that?
Bonnie: You can follow a script or someone can tell you what to do, but I think it rings truer and it just means more to people when you're yourself. You have to have empathy and understand the situation and the problem and try to deal with it the best you can and be as fair as possible.
Deirdre: Bonnie, if you could say one thing to someone just starting out in hospitality leadership, what would you say?
Bonnie: I think it's a very common thing—especially for new managers, I know I did it—it's very easy to fall into this role of, “I'm the boss because I said so.” And it's really difficult for people to have trust and mutual respect when it comes from a place like that. I always try to think of myself instead of pulling my staff, I'm pushing. Support from the rear—that's how people will really listen to you, follow you, respect you. You don't have to throw your weight around. If you have to tell people you're the boss, you're probably not the boss, then. Just treat people with respect and show that you're working hard alongside them, not just, you know, above them. And everything will turn out great.
Deirdre: You have one condiment in your refrigerator, what is it?
Bonnie: Hot sauce, gotta be hot sauce. Can put it on everything. I have so many favorites. I really like Crystal Hot Sauce. That vinegar base really gets me in the back of the throat.
Deirdre: Thank you, Bonnie, for joining us this week on Tableside Talks and sharing your expert advice on leadership and the industry.